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Honoring Our Loved Ones


Today I am struck by the blue of the sky. My Grandpa Truex used to say, ”There is no blue like the blue of an October sky.” He transitioned back to spirit almost 20 years ago; and yet, he is here in my mind and heart offering support and unconditional love. In a recent trade, another medium connected with him; and as I listened to his description, although it was just a bit about him, I could remember all of him. He loved to play cards with me. He played the saw. Yes, it was the kind you cut trees with. He would take a violin bow across it and out would come a beautiful sound. I can still feel it reverberate in my soul as he would play Amazing Grace. I was his girl, and he was my beloved grandpa. Nothing can take away the memories we have of our loved ones; and while they aren’t here in human form, I can tell you from my view that they are still here. I hold onto the words of a wise soul from the other side who, when asked what she wanted on her gravestone by her devoted, heartbroken mother, said, “In this lifetime and beyond, true love never ends.” It’s true. It’s the only thing that matters. Love, true love. Not the conditional kind of I’ll love you when or if. It’s the kind of love that reaches into your soul and feels like the truth. The kind that recognizes the sparkle of another soul. The love we share with others is what this life is all about. As we quickly approach Halloween and All Saints Day, I would encourage you to think of your loved ones who are beyond this life. Think of what you loved about them, imagine the warmth of a hug wrapping around you from them and smile. Smile in your heart as you feel that they still love you in the purest of forms. My mentor talked to me about creating a little place in my home for my people, my ancestors and loved ones on November 1. I love this tradition so much. It is a time to remember and honor all that they were and are. Last year, I placed my Grandpa T’s pocket Bible that guided him through WWII, my Grandma T’s horn rimmed glasses, two small blue birds that were theirs, a broach that my Grandpa M brought back for my grandma from WWII and a lovely piece of milk glass from my Gigiin a beautiful arrangement on my mantle. My darling daughter who has never met any of these souls other than Gigi, brought a token from her Grandpa to be added in remembrance of a man she loved. Then we placed my Great Grandmother’s beads ornately around with love. It was a lovely sight. We lit a white candle and filled our hearts with gratitude for their love and our heritage. Sometimes small rituals can feel like a balm to our deep ache of longing and missing. I encourage you this week to consider setting aside a time to remember, whether through an arrangement of gifts, sharing a memory or creating a new memory doing something your loved one enjoyed doing. As you do, breath in, imagine their smell whether perfume or the Halls they always sucked or the smell they created in the kitchen, and feel their love. Feel it envelop you and offer you comfort and inspiration for your journey. I guarantee they want you to live, to celebrate and most of all to love. Remember, true love never ends.

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